Dark forces rising

Dark forces must be at work tonight because I ended up in the wrong place at Port Authority. I mean I strolled right into that mofo, head held up high, my mind praying that no one had taken my favorite corner stall, when I suddenly realized that there must be either butch night out in the city or I had entered the men’s room by mistake. By the shocked looks of the people on both sides of the room, protectively cradling their tools in one hand and trying to zip up with the other, i understood the second was true.
To make matters worse, the homeless druggie who’d set up house in the corner under the sink, kept repeating indignantly: “Miss, this is the men’s room, miss, this is the men’s room, the men’s room, miss.” Then he got up an pointed me out of there. I obeyed, trying to become an insect, a molecule, an atom and begging that my future husband was not watching me in the meanwhile, his tool in hand and his pants around his ankles.
Later on, on the bus, the humiliation finally left its place to desperate reasoning. I mean I was always an open-minded feminist anyway. And I am over thirty. And it is nothing I haven’t seen before. And there is no law that stops men from using women’s bathrooms and vice-versa. And nobody saw me. Nobody cares. Nobody remembered my face two seconds after coming out of that bedroom. And I don’t really have to wear the same grey blazer anyway. I think i would look great in a shaved head, never mind the ocipicie thingies.
It must be the dark forces influence, it must be, since I found a hair in my hot dog this morning. It was a black and coarse hair standing defiant in front of my incredulous gaze. and then later i was late for work, and i missed my bus stop so I had to run like the wind (addmittedly a very fat and geriatric wind, but a wind nevertheless) until i caught it. so…watch out.
And hopefully tomorrow I will remember to look before I go into a room and before I start unbuttoning my own pants.

3 thoughts on “Dark forces rising

  1. hahaha i swear this is true!!!!!! Please read..

    Today I had to attend this forum about my work.Nice place, kind of a discovery park..
    Anyway, I thought I go to the toilet after having 2 coups of coffees one after the other.
    On the way to the toilet next to this long corridor, I find my self following this woman… She’s just 3-4 steps in front of me… Nothing weird in here… as we arrive near the toilets you came face to face with two doors… one with a MALE notice above the door and the other one with a Female one.
    To my horror the woman goes straight into the MALE door…!!!
    I stop for a moment in front of the doors and think…. My brain is working fast!!
    Doubts start coming to your mind…
    First thought; Read the signs vigilantly!! Yehhh that’s right it does says MALE!
    Second; was she a woman?? Well… She had long hair, wearing a skirt, high shoes.. I’m in no doubt she was a woman!!
    What do I do now? Can’t possible get into the ladies…!!! If I get in to the Male toilet than what do I say in front of her??
    To my relief the door opens and the women appears with her hand covering her face, and she went even redder with embarrassment when she saw me.
    “I’m ever so sorry… I don’t know how I did that… My mind clearly not functioning this morning.. Please don’t tell anyone in there..!”
    Both start laughing!!

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