i was reading some back comments on another blog entry of mine, and i found this “push my button, make me come” comment from tropizma. and i thought what if there really was such a button? it would be a great help for mankind. possibly a bit like that Staples commercial with the big bright red one that turns everything into organized offices or sth.
list of good things that might come out of such a button:
less war of the sexes. he would know what to push, and she would get a happy ending. and vice-versa. all this without having to communicate.
a clear and definite location of the said button. men would have more time to watch sports and women would have more time to cook dinner.
there would actually be much more room for books with important knowledge.
kama-sutra would only be a one page diagram and it would be easier to hide it under the school textbook.
not only would dirty talk be easier to remember, but it would probably be obsolete. none of that sticking, stuffing, soaking and slathering talk thank you very much. (Imagine having to help with the Thanksgiving turkey after)
there would be less cheating, and it would actually be much easier to stay with the chosen partner for the important reasons, i.e. financial situation, appearances, taste etc.
a lap dance would cost much less.
the politicians would not be as easily corrupted.
some might argue that the button would make it too easy. well then we could possibly push the button legal age to 35. by that age the women are harried trying to show they can do it all, the men are already arrogant jerks on their way up the ladder and no one has the time or the patience to remember the partner’s body diagram. a few uuuhs, ooohs, aaahs for old times sake and then puuuff, push the button and everybody is happy. it is exactly the same now, but mostly without the happy ending. and the fortunate few who can get happy ending any time even without the button, well they don’t have to use it, do they? they can continue to show off.
of course there would have to be a legislation about use in public places, by disgruntled exes, overpowering older employers, ect etc. but these are just minor things to be hashed on the way out.
so bring on the happy button.
p.s for those who argue that the button exists, i agree, but the operation’s manual is too difficult.